Dealing with the Stress of Life

Talking with my wife about this week's activities, I was reminded of when I was a young boy. There was a game I liked to play, we would set up chairs and balls and brooms and all sorts of obstacles and we would see who could make it past all of them the fastest, without touching any of them. We called it an "obstacle course," you might be familiar with that game.
 
This week is particularly busy for us; that is what reminded me of the obstacle courses I would love going through as a child. When going through the different challenges, I never worried about what was coming up ahead, I just focused on the task at hand, enjoyed it, accomplished it, and moved on to the next until I had cleared all obstacles. Life is very much like this, some weeks more than others.
 
The interesting part about this game was that it was not a stressful game. I was not stressed or anxious or nervous about it, but it was fun and enjoyable. I think looking at life with that same approach can be very beneficial sometimes. Isn't that what life really is, an obstacle course that we are to go through?
 
Now, let me clarify, the activities that we have going on this week are of no great significance, they are just part of the business of life. We are busy preparing for an upcoming trip to visit some friends, getting ready and shopping for a dog that will be joining our family on Thursday evening, cooking and delivering two meals to a couple of new mothers at church, involved with the activities related with raising two children under two years old, dealing with some impending deadlines at work, as well as a day-trip to a nearby state on Thursday morning, and keeping up to date with ministry activities, including hosting a community group meeting on Wednesday night, and writing for this blog. Failure to accomplish most of the items in this list will not result in any kind of negative long-term consequence. I will not loose my job, go bankrupt, go hungry, or have my home foreclosed, those are different. As a matter of fact, if I play my cards correctly, I will not even miss my bedtime.
 
However, it is still easy to get stressed out and anxious over having a packed-out schedule for the week. To be honest, this week is so packed that, if I am not careful, I would start feeling suffocated and overwhelmed. That is why keeping the right perspective is so important, it will help you remove large amounts of stress that are related to simply being alive.
 
Today, I want to challenge you to look at the obstacles in your life as a challenge to be enjoyed, instead of a chore or nuisance to be dealt with. Take one day at a time, one obstacle at a time, and ENJOY WHAT YOU ARE DOING!!!
 
Look at the activities in which you are involved in an objective way. Judge them according to how important they are, focus on those things that have significant consequences, and don't worry about the others; they are just there to keep your life entertaining.
 
"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Matthew 6:34, ESV
 
 
"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice." Philippians 4:4

A Godly Self-Esteem, Part 2

Let us reason together.

If you base your self-image and worth on what you do or how you behave, it will be damaged every time you make a mistake, sin, or fall short. However, if you base your self-worth on God's love, every act of repentance will be a reassurance of that love and help you understand how truly valuable you are. To do this, however, one must accept the fact that, as a human, anything other than sinful imperfection is impossible while on this earth, and everything we are and do that may be of worth is by His grace and power alone.

You are valuable enough for Him to sacrifice His beautiful, perfect, and infinite Son for your sake!!!

You are invaluable! Don't buy into the lie that you are not. That is called a lie and false humility. True humility comes from honesty and knowing the truth about who God is and who you are. Denying the worth that He has bestowed upon you is not an act of humility; it is an act of blatant disrespect towards God. It is an outright insult towards Him.

A closing thought: just as you are invaluable to Him, everyone else it too. Remember that Jesus came to save "whosoever" accepts Him. Likewise, you and I are able to do "good" only because of His grace. He uses other people to grow us, teach us, discipline us, and help us become of use for His kingdom. So, when you encounter someone in need that might seem undisciplined, sinful, disgusting, evil, "addicted," or "inferior," just remember that the only difference between you and that person is the influence that God chose to have on your life. Would you be that much different from that person if you had grown up in the same circumstances? No, you would not. If God had given you the same personality, upbringing, education, emotional disposition, etc., you probably would not be that different from this "inferior" individual.

It might very well be that He wants to use you to make that same difference on his or her life!!!

A Godly Self-Esteem, Part 1

The topic of self-esteem is sometimes shunned amongst Christians because of its seeming conflict with the concept of humility. However, self-esteem is very critical. A poor self-image can cripple you, robbing you of your ability to enjoy God, your relationships with others, your life, and your ability to fulfill God's will.

As a matter of fact, I would argue that a poor self-esteem is borderline blasphemy or sin. Why? For three reasons:

1. God made you in His image, and as such you are invaluable.
2. God clearly thinks that you are worth enough to sacrifice His Son for your sake.
3. If the spirit of God lives in you your worth in infinite because of His presence. If I filled a building with gold and sell it as a unit, its worth would be (at least) equal to its content. The same is true of everyone indwelled by the Holy Spirit.

Lets give credit to where credit is due. God said you are very valuable. You should recognize, accept, and agree with this. Otherwise, you would be disagreeing with God.

The difference between worldly and Godly self-esteem is where the self-esteem comes from and what it is based upon.

The world bases self-esteem mostly on performance, discipline, ability, or a character trait. As a Christian, this is inappropriate. It is imperative to understand that our value as people does not come from what we can do. Whatever our abilities may be, they are not our own. They were given to us by God, so our skills, abilities, and character are not a valid source of self-worth, self-esteem, or confidence; they are a source of thanksgiving and praise towards Him. God's love for you, Jesus' sacrifice, and His presence within you are the only valid source of self-esteem and much more powerful ones.

Worldly self-esteem could lead to a "better-thou" attitude. Godly self-esteem will always lead you to understanding that all people are equally valuable, there is no such thing as a "better" or "superior" person.

Why to Forgive

Jesus gave some serious warnings about forgiveness, but I have heard people (some of them very influential) dismiss those warning solely based on the concept that salvation cannot be lost, which has not been irrefutably determined based on what the scripture says.

The Arminian-Calvinist conflict has been around for centuries, and, in my opinion, neither side presents a satisfactory argument. To put it in a probably overly simplistic way, the Arminians would say that salvation could be had and lost based on choice. According to the way they interpret the scriptures, God gives man the choice, therefore man can choose to accept salvation and later reject it. The Calvinists argue that this is not the case, that man cannot choose, but God moves their heart to accept salvation and, once accepted, it can never be lost. In my opinion, neither side is correct. I do not have an alternative view of this issue, but both of them can be argued from the scriptures and I have not been able to find a successful resolution to it. There are pros and cons to both sides of that coin.

I am not against Calvinism, but it is important to understand both sides of the argument because following the Calvinist thought could cause believers to ignore one of the most serious warnings that Jesus gave us during his earthly ministry.

"For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." Matthew 6:14-15, ESV

That is a very serious statement and warning, and that is not the only time Jesus mentions this concept. In Matthew 18:21-35 Jesus tells the parable of the wicked servant who, being forgiven of his debt, refused to forgive those that owed him and was sent to jail until he could repay the entirety of his debt. The passage ends with the same warning.

"And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart." Matthew 18:34,35, ESV

This might sound like works-based salvation, but, from the scripture quoted above, it could be argued that forgiving those that offend, hurt, and "owe" us is a requirement for our own salvation.

Regardless of whether your theology aligns with the Arminian or Calvinist view, I would encourage you to pay attention to the bitterness and un-forgiveness in your heart. Ask God to help you forgive those that owe you, so you may not be that wicked servant or end up like him!!!
 
Learn How To Forgive Here
 

Video - Ben Breedlove - Near Death Experience Testimony

Do you believe in Angels or God?

I DO!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Breedlove

This video went viral in December 2011 - January 2012. Right after this 18 year old posted this video, he moved on to be with the Lord. I still think it is relevant.

A senior manager at the place where I work passed on suddenly after having a heart attack. No one saw it coming. Videos and testimonies like this are a definite help when dealing with death.

The Practice of the presence of God - Brother Lawrence

Today, I wanted to share with you a book that inspired me greatly when I first became a follower of Christ. I do not remember who introduced me to this Christian Classic, but I am glad that they did.
 
The book is titled: The Practice of the Presence of God, Rules of Holy Life
 
Here is a link to the Wikipedia Article on the book, as well as one to the "Biographical" page of Brother Lawrence.
 
Since this book was written several hundred years ago, it is part of the public domain and can be obtained for free. I was glad to discover that Project Gutenberg, The Christian Classics Ethereal Library, and LibriVox have free copies of this work in written and audio formats.
 
So here are the links.
 
Free text Version at Project Gutenberg can be found here, Available in the following formats: Text, HTML, Epub, Kindle, and more
 
Free Audio version at LibriVox can be downloaded from here
 
Free and Paid copies of the text and audio versions at The Christian Classics Ethereal Library can be found here
 
I hope it blesses you in the same way it blessed me.

Is online ministry biblical?

In this article, I will set out to establish whether online ministries are an actual biblical concept, but in order to do that, we need to do a bit of time travel and take a trip to approximately 2000 years ago.

If we study the structure of the New Testament, we will find out that it is mostly comprised of letters written from different apostles to various audiences. In some cases, the writers were familiar with the church or individual to whom they were writing; in some other cases they were not.

Saying that this type of ministry is a long-distance ministry is a very valid statement. If we take into consideration that there was no such thing as electricity back then, we can conclude that the written word was actually break-through technology in the realm of information management. It was the fastest way available to transfer information through long distances. The internet, email, and online ministries serve the same function; they are just a new and improved version of the model the apostoles used back then. The only difference is that nowadays we are using the iPad instead of iPapyrus! (OK, I confess, that was a corny joke.)

It is worth mentioning that this was not the only mode of ministry that those receiving the instruction were exposed to. The churches back then were basically a network of small groups. The apostles were the senior ministers, but there were other mature christians discipling and helping the younger christians in their spiritual growth.

It is the same nowadays. Online ministries by themselves are very valid, but that cannot be the only source of ministry you are involved in. Get plugged into a church in your area. Find a small group to be a part of with which you can share your life. Every Christian needs instruction on the Word of God, but we also need an experienced mentor to show us how to apply it to our everyday lives and help us in the growing process!!

Video - Sweetly Broken - Jeremy Riddle

What a beautiful thing it is to humble our hearts and worship God!!

What an incredible thing it is that we, sinful and broken, can have an intimate relationship with someone like Him!

We have been given an infinitely beautiful gift at the cross. I look forward to getting to heaven because only then will we be able to understand the fullness of what He did at the cross for us.

And it will only be then that we will behold the full extent of His beauty!!!

He is worthy of our worship!!!

How To Be Peaceful

"Turn away from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it." Psalm 34:14, ESV

Peace is something that everyone wants but not many have. The psalm quoted above clearly states that if we want to have peace in our lives we must be intentional in our pursuit of it.These two verses below are a good blueprint for how to seek and pursue peace in our hearts and lives.

"The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks."Luke 6:45, ESV

"Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life." Galatians 6:7, 8 ESV

When I think about peace, three different aspects of my life comes to mind: the internal, the circumstantial, and the interpersonal.

The internal aspect of peace is what happens within myself. Specifically, it is how I think and feel about myself. It is important to accept who God made you to be. It is important to stop trying to be like everyone else and be yourself. God made you the way you are for a reason. He has a plan for your life: EMBRACE IT!! Similarly, it is also important to understand and accept that you are not, and never will be, perfect. Life is a journey of growing ever closer to God, of changing, of expanding your comfort zone, of continual learning. Embrace this aspect of life, and be gracious towards yourself for not being perfect. Adopt the attitude that Joyce Meyer expresses in the following quote towards yourself and your life.

“I may not be where I need to be but I thank God I am not where I used to be.” Joyce Meyer

The circumstantial aspect of peace has to do with life events. Whether it is a health condition, financial, or family situation, it is important to understand two things about external circumstances:

1. We all make mistakes and get into situations that eventually become overwhelming and require "rescuing" from. This is part of why we are called "sheep" in the bible. Sheep are continually getting into trouble from which they cannot save themselves. We do the same thing. So, trust that your Shepherd will come to your rescue, even when you get yourself in trouble!!

2. There are aspects of life that we cannot control. Things will happen that we cannot prevent and can do nothing to resolve. When this happens, you have two options. You can either freak out, stress out, and gain nothing from it, or you can accept them for what they are and trust that your Shepherd will rescue you from this one as well.

Either way, trusting in the wisdom, power, and loving kindness of your father/shepherd/rescuer/lover of your soul, is a fundamental aspect of living a life in peace. That is why He says that "the righteous shall live by faith."

The third aspect of peace, the interpersonal, has to do with our relationships with others. Whether it is family, friends, co-workers or classmates, difficulties will arise. Difficulties will even arise with complete strangers in unexpected ways. For example, have you ever been cut-off in traffic by a reckless driver that decided to do something dangerous and put you and your family at risk? This can be quite disturbing. People are imperfect, sinful, selfish, etc., and this will cause difficulties, disagreements, and strife. It is important to make love, grace, wisdom, and humility the centerpiece of the way in which you interact with others. It is just as important to trust that God will protect you from the poor decisions that others make, just as He will protect others from your (or my) poor decisions!!

Living in peace, at whichever level, always requires trusting in God and listening to His advice and wisdom. As we stated earlier, in order to obtain peace, you must be intentional about your pursuit of it. You need to start sowing seeds of peace into all three aspects of you life: the way you see and think about yourself, the way you perceive the world, and your relationships with others.

Are you sowing peace, love, and faith into your heart and life, or are you sowing something else?

Visualization

Visualization exercises have been around for a long time, and if you talk to talk to people in the business or fitness/sports world, they will testify to the power of this mental tool.

However, in the religious world, visualization exercises have been regarded as evil or demonic. I am not sure why certain people have taken this position. In my opinion, those that tend to take this point of view seem to be the overly "religious" people, and I mean "religious" in the negative and legalistic sense of the word. It seems to me that they blur the line between the mind and the spirit, as if there were no such difference.

The bible does not mention any particular way of meditation, but it does express that we should meditate on God and his word on a continual basis. If meditation is a mental discipline that we are commanded to practice, why are they so against this particular form? My answer is: they do not understand what meditation truly is.

Are visualization  Exercises godly?

Visualization can be just as godly or demonic as prayer.

If you are praying to Satan, then your prayers are completely ungodly and demonic. If you are praying to God, then your prayers are potentially an exercise in godliness  just as much as they are a means of intimacy with Him. It really depends on how you use the visualization exercise and what you visualize. Every human being has three parts: The Spirit, The soul (mind, will, and emotions), and the body (physical, physiological, and sensations). So everything a human being does needs to be analyzed according to these three aspects.

Visualization is mainly a mental exercise. The spiritual side of visualization varies depending on how you use it. If I use visualization exercises to discipline my mind to focus on God, be loving, patient, understanding, and so forth, then the exercise will produce godly fruit and can be judged as godly. If I use visualization to produce selfishness, pride, and depravity, then the exercise can be judged as ungodly. Ultimately, visualization is a form of meditation. It is a way of changing the way you think and perceive the object of your visualization.

As a matter of fact, everyone uses visualization. Think about the last time you got angry. I mean really, really angry with someone. What did you ? If you are anything like me, you probably sat around thinking about the offense, brooding over it. And you were not just thinking, you were imagining the situation, you could see yourself, what happened, how you would have liked to react, what you would have said or done, or what you were planning on saying and doing in the near future. This was visualization, of the wrong kind. 

I am no psychological guru, but it is my understanding that our minds work largely in terms of pictures, instead of abstract concepts or actual words. So visualization is not so do much something we do, but a way in which our minds works. When people talk about visualization exercises, the are really talking about meditation and psychological programming. There is nothing evil or abnormal about that. What makes the exercise evil is the attitude behind it, and how you use it.

The right kind of visualization can actually be a form of prayer. It can be a visual conversation with God, a way of sharing with him the desire of your heart, and ask him to change you to be more like Him.This is when visualizing becomes a powerful tool for growing closer to God, and sowing good into our hearts and spirit.

Video - Michael W. Smith - Awesome God

What an awesome God we serve!!!

The worship team sang this song on Sunday, and I wanted to share it with you today. I pray it is as uplifting to you as it was to me after missing church for about three weeks straight.

Be encouraged, we serve an awesome, beautiful, God. He loves you and will cause everything to work out for your benefit, even if it does not feel that way.

He is good, and He loves you infinitely!!!


 

I Really Wish We All Understood This

I had an interesting experience the other day. I went for a walk with my son, whom being obsessed with yard maintenance, wanted to go look at the neighbor mow her lawn. Naturally, I held him above my head so the two feet tall child could admire the coveted item over the privacy fence that separated this neighbor from our property.
 
Since this particular neighbor would probably find it strange that a levitating baby was looking at her from above her seven feet tall fence, I decided to say hello and strike up a conversation. Talking to someone else across a fence, without being able to see her or her face, was an interesting and extremely awkward experience. Have you ever had a conversation like that?
 
You might be tempted to answer "No," or "Rarely," but I want to challenge that answer. If I had to answer that question honestly, which is the way I try to answer all questions, I would have to say that most of my conversations are that way!! That is a sad truth.
 
By now you have probably figured out that I am not talking about a physical wall, but an emotional one. As a community group leader, this is one of the major obstacles I face.
 
Why do we hide our true selves behind emotional walls, or "facades" so often? Why are we scared to show our "true colors"?
 
I think the answer is simple. We are insecure. We are more scared of being rejected by men than secure in our acceptance by God.
 
If God, who knows the deepest darkest recesses of my heart and mind, has chosen to adopt me as his very own child, what does it matter what anyone else thinks about me?
 
Lets review this. God is infinite. He created the heavens and the earth simply by speaking a few words. He understands the most amazing secrets, some of which we don't even know exist. He can tell the sun, the moon, and the stars what to do, and they obey Him. He is more important, powerful and influential than all human beings combined.
 
If this God thinks that I am worth dying for, why do I care what some puny little soul thinks of me?
 
Today I want to challenge you to think about God and who He is! How awesome, powerful, infinite, and amazing He is. Truly meditate on how much He loves YOU!!!
 
Yes, GOD LOVES YOU!!! And HE CHOSE YOU!!!
 
You do not have to "earn" anything. You do not need to perform in order to be loved, accepted, or special.
 
You are special to God just like you are. Who cares what everyone else thinks?
 
Believe this, live by it, and BE AN AUTHENTIC CHRISTIAN!!!

Enjoying You Life-Ride

I took my son to my neighbor's swing this weekend and started thinking about the way I push him. The first time I took him out there, I quickly decided that I would push my child from the front instead of the back. That way he could still see me smile at him, and I would get to see him laugh and enjoy himself. This way we would swing together instead of me acting like a simple robot. It is a little more difficult but worth the effort.

This time, however, I started swinging him faster and faster until he started getting a little scared, which at this point I slowed down. As I was reflecting on his fear, it dawned on me that we, as followers of Christ, go through very similar experiences with Him.

Lets analyze what went on. The swing was perfectly safe; I made sure of it. I could have pushed my child much harder and faster than he was going without any danger. He became scared because of two things. First, he did not understand what was going on; the additional speed was a new experience to him. Second, he did not trust me, probably because he was not aware that I had insured his safety through the activity.

How similar is that to our relationship with God?!?! I go through that process all the time. God will try to push me a little higher, and a little faster, knowing that I would enjoy the ride. All the while, I am terrified of the new height and speed simply because it is new to me, I do not understand it, and I do not trust that He has insured my safety!!!

Additionally, God is a relational God. He wants to go through the ride with us, looking at us, smiling at us, seeing us enjoy the ride while He pushes us and leads us through this life!!

However, unlike me, God will ask you ahead of time and give you the choice to refuse the "enhanced experience."

Do you continually refuse God's higher levels? If so, why? Are you afraid of something new? Do you trust that God has insured your safety?

Frustration, Impatience, and Control, Part 2

Impatience can be a source of great emotional distress. Dictionary.com defines impatience as "an eager desire for relief or change; restlessness," or "intolerance of anything that thwarts, delays, or hinders."

I got a flat tire on my way to a very important appointment. I had an hour to spare, but when I attempted to change the despicable item, I found myself unable to lift the car because my jack was missing parts! As if that were not enough, once I finally did manage to install the spare tire, it had low air pressure!!!

That was a frustrating experience. My level of frustration escalated as the time of my appointment came and went. My feelings could certainly be described as "intolerance of anything that thwarts, delays, or hinders" by the end of the experience. You could also describe them as rage.

In retrospective, I should have taken a few minutes to collect myself, connect, and talk to God about the situation and proceed to analyze the possible solutions in a systematic way. Instead, I chose to become angry. Anger is a natural enemy of common sense. By accepting the things I could not change (the flat tire, missing parts, and low air pressure) and trusting that God would see me through, I would have been able to resolve the issue much faster than I did.

Being content with your life requires trust in God, because we have to trust that He will take care of those things that we cannot.

Trusting God in difficult times helps keep us grounded and logical during those crises instead of reacting in an emotionally uncontrolled way that makes things even worse.

It is easy to have patience when you are not pressed for time; however, keeping your cool when time is of the essence and you encounter unforeseen delays is a completely different matter that requires a much greater level of spiritual maturity!!

I failed to accept the situation and trust God!!

In the end, it all turned out well. Event though I was thirty minutes late to my appointment, the meeting went on as planned and everything turned out fine. I could have prevented some major emotional distress by trusting God through those difficult couple of hours.

How often do you run into situations like this? How do you respond?

Frustration, Impatience, and Control

I have started to realize that there is a lot of frustration in my life that stems from impatience and the desire to control people and cituations that are well beyond my control.

Do you find yourself dealing with these issues?

Now, it is not a conscious decision. It is more like an attitude, something that happens automatically, in the background, and causes me to want to change things I could never change. The frustration arises from my inhability to change these factors.

The bible speaks about this issue in terms of contentment.

"Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment," 1 Timothy 6:6 ESV

Contentment seems to indicate an acceptance of how things are in the present, specially of those things I can not control. It does not mean that we like the present condition, or that we resign ourselves to living in it, but it does indicate an acceptance of them and, at the same time, a release of our desire to control and change them.

Do your best in whatever circumstance you find yourself, and let God take care of the rest. Identify the things that you can do something about, and do it. Identify the things that you can not do anything about, and release them to God. Try to identify how you got to where you are and learn from that so you can prevent it in the future.

Join us next time as we discuss the relationship between impatience and frustration!

Keeping your Spiritual Battery Full

I bought my first smart phone about a year ago. At the time, it was the top of the line, but it had one known issue, the battery would not keep its charge for long. At most, you would get six or seven hours of charge, if you didn't use it much.

Knowing that I spend most of my time either in my car or at my desk, I did not consider this a problem, and it has not been. I bought a car adapter and an extra USB cord so I could keep it plugged up while on my 45-minute commute to work and while I am at the office. Problem solved. I rarely ever run out of battery. As a matter of fact, my phone has 100% battery most of the time.

Photo courtesy of
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Our spiritual and emotional lives work the same way as the phone's battery. When we stay connected to Christ, we have a full battery, are at peace, love others, and can lead a life that brings glory to Him. We can even function "unplugged" for a little while.

However, there is danger in letting our battery run low. That is when we start running into trouble, living depressed, discouraged, frustrated, angry, anxious, etc. What I have observed in my life, and the lives of others, is that not only do we not "plug" ourselves often enough, a lot of us go through life with an empty battery, and only occasionally do we spend enough time with Him to get even a marginal amount of spiritual charge back. We run on empty all the time, and when we do get a little charge back, we consider it a supernatural touch of God.

Being filled with His spirit, life, encouragement, and strength, should be the rule, not the exception.

So, Why don't we live this way?

When I bought my cell phone, I was very aware of the problem, and I created a plan to address it!! I bought the extra chargers, and I developed the discipline of plugging the thing in as soon as I got in the truck or to my desk.

It is the same thing with our spiritual lives. You, me, and every other Christian out there have a very low "battery life," and we all need a plan to keep ourselves charged!!

What is your plan? How are you planning on staying charged-up?

Charge yourself often!!! Plug into God at every opportunity!!! Start living your life on a full charge, instead of a burned-out one!!!

Keeping the WHY in mind

Free Image courtesy of
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Do you loose sight of why you do what you do?

I was supposed to be spending a relaxed and friendly family night with my wife, playing Super Mario Bros. on our Wii, but it turned out to be a lot less relaxed or fun than we had expected.

I lost sight of the fact that I was playing and got into "performance mode". Every time my wife would do something that I did not agree with or my Mario character would die, I would become frustrated and upset, which is not a great way to spend a night of marital entertainment.

Let me clarify, I probably had about three billion lives left, so I could have continued dying and re-playing those level until I was blue in the face without any problem, but I lost sight of what I was doing. I was supposed to be having fun. Instead, I was in performance mode trying to "get it done."

I lost sight of the WHY behind the WHAT!!!

Next time you are starting to feel frustrated or upset, take a quick break and ask yourself, "Why am I feeling this way? What am I doing? Why am I doing this? Is this really that important?"

Sticks and Stones

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"

You have heard that saying before. You have probably also heard people disagree with it in resent years. I have to admit that it bothers me when I hear people disagree with that (non biblical) proverb. It is not that I think they are wrong in their disagreement; it's just that they have taken the saying out of context. The phrase is not incorrect; it is just incomplete. Additionally, it was originally deviced as a means to teach children how to react to insults. It's original intent was to teach children not to react physically to verbal insults, and to ignore them. Which is something that a lot of adults also need to learn.

Zig Ziglar quoted a little girl who said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will break my heart."

Here is my version of it, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me, unless I allow them to"

You, as an adult, have the power to choose whether other people's words will hurt you or not.

If someone approached you and tried to correct you by telling you that 2 + 2 is not equal to 4, you would probably laugh, ignore them, and continue living your life in peace. Why would this correction make no impact in your life?

Because of your confidence that the assertion is mistaken

You should be able to respond in the same way when anyone approaches you and corrects you in any way, as long as they are mistaken in their assertion.

Whether they are bringing up a character flaw, an attitude, action, or they are calling you every name in the book; as long as they are mistaken, you should be able to ignore them and keep living your life without disturbance. So the question is, why don't you react in this way? Here are the two possible answers to that question:

A. They are not mistaken and their assertion is correct, or
B. You are insecure about yourself

Today I want to challenge you to inspect the way you react to people during conflict. Are you confident enough to say to yourself, "They are wrong," and GRACEFULLY ignore them?

Or, if they are correct, are you humble enough to accept that they are correct in their assertion and ask for forgiveness, instead of becoming defensive?

How to Reduce Frustration

"Whoever restrains his words  has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding."  Proverbs 17:27, ESV

I had two people become seriously upset at me this  morning as I was driving to work. Apparently, I was not driving fast enough  for them. What I do not understand is why would they become so upset when  they could clearly see that there was someone in from of me blocking my  way. I was already going ten miles over the speed limit; there was no way  I could possibly go faster. Traffic would not allow it, and I would not  have gone faster even if it had been a possibility.

Life is full of annoying  little instances that cause frustration, delays, inconveniences, and so  forth. Some other instances are not so little, and can be much more painful  and difficult than traffic; these are a topic for a different post.

The  two drivers I encountered this morning were obviously shortsighted. They  could have avoided some serious heartache if they would have taken time  to look a little more carefully and think before reacting in anger. I hope  they have a different attitude towards their families.

We can save ourselves  a lot of frustration by having a little more knowledge and understanding,  like the proverb states. It is a matter of keeping a level head and analyzing  the situation we find ourselves in. It is a matter of understanding that  the past cannot be changed, but it can be learned from. It is a matter  of understanding that people are sinful, and they will let us down. It  is matter of understanding that no one can be perfect, including yourself  and your spouse (if you have, or will have, one.)

Undesirable circumstances are inevitable, but can be reduced by studying them, and learning how to minimize their occurrence.

How often do you find yourself angry, upset,  or frustrated simply because you did not take the time to step back and  look at the situation in more detail before reacting?

How To Be Happy, Part 10

Study, continued.

Last time we talked about the importance  of continuing studying, applying what we learn, and growing closer to God,  as a continual process to achieving great happiness (or Joy) in our lives.

When I first started writing this  series, I intended to make it two or three posts long. I had no idea how  extensive it would end up being. And it is much more extensive then what  we have covered so far. As a matter of fact, it is just as extensive as  the bible is. And I am not posting a copy of the bible 400 words at a time.

So, visit our Articles or enCOURAGE  pages, where you will find additional articles and resources that are directly  related to this topic. Keep on studying and growing closer  to God, that is the ultimate way to achieve any degree of happiness and  joy in life, and that is what these articles are aimed at helping you achieve.

How to Be Happy, Part 9

Study.

"My people are destroyed  for lack of knowledge; because you have rejected knowledge, I reject you  from being a priest to me. And since you have forgotten the law of your  God, I also will forget your children." Hosea 4:6, ESV

The pursuit  of happiness, then, becomes a process of identifying those aspects in our  lives that need to be changed, and changing them. If you are perfectly  happy, then you should continue doing what you are doing. If you are not  happy with your life, then change is necessary. In order for change to  be effective you need to know WHAT to change, and HOW to change it. In  order to gain this, or any other kind of knowledge, study is necessary.

Many  a time I have read a book or scripture to find myself having more knowledge  (knowing "what" to change) at the end of the task, but having  had no effect on my character or performance. Studying, therefore, is not  enough. You must also apply what you learn in order to effect change (this  is the "How" part, plus a little bit of work and discipline).

"It's  not what you got, it is what you use that makes the difference" Zig  Ziglar.

I have heard it said that "If you always do what you've always  done, you will always get what you've always got." The same concept  is expressed in the, now cliché, definition of insanity according to Albert  Einstein: "Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but  expecting different results."

The amount of knowledge and advice in the  bible is more than any person could ever understand or apply in a lifetime.  Telling yourself otherwise is lying to yourself.

Saying that people never change is a great mistake. People can change their nature, if they ask  God to change it for them. People CAN change their character and habits.  People change; as a matter of fact, people are always changing and never stay the same.

If you are not studying, and applying what you learn, you  are not progressing. If you are not progressing, you are regressing. There  is no such thing as staying the same. You are either progressing or regressing.

Lets  think about this, what is the purpose of pastors, counselors, psychologists,  psychiatrists, and mentors? Isn't the very function of the people in these  positions to help others change?

Yes, it is. If people could not change,  there would be no such things as pastors, counselors, psychologists, psychiatrists,  or mentors, because they would have failed a long time ago. They are still  around because they have been successful at helping people change themselves, and their lives, for the better!!

The same change is possible for you  and I!!

How to be Happy, Part 8

It is all about Choices.

It is one  thing to understand, at the logical level, that God is good, that he loves  us, and is in control. At an emotional level, it is a different deal. I  get very anxious at negative thoughts that present the idea of financial  insecurity.

Logically, I know that God is hugely powerful and loving and  He will provide for me. At the emotional level, I do not.

It is my understanding  that, if you truly believe something, it should change the way you feel  about that specific thing. For example, if I TRULY believed with all my  heart soul mind and strength that God would protect me and provide for  me, I would not become fearful and anxious at the first sight of trouble.  My natural reaction would say: "No big deal, God will see me through  this." This would happen at an emotional level, allowing me to keep  my peace.

Is this your natural reaction when faced with trouble or uncertainties?

Our  sinful nature, Satan, and the world, work hard at keeping us focused on  the things we don't have, on instant gratification, selfish ambitions.

So  far, we have discussed things such as our thoughts, focusing our mind on  Him, giving him thanks, and being obedient. All these things are choices.  They are disciplines that we choose to develop or choose not to develop.

Beyond  the ages-old argument of predestination versus free will, one thing cannot  be disputed; the actions I take have consequences. If I make a good choice,  I reap the benefits. If I make a poor choice, I reap the consequences as  well.

Happiness then, is a choice. We choose to develop those disciplines.  We choose to practice them (persevere) until they become an automatic part  of who we are (habitual or instinctive, a second nature.)

So today I want to challenge you  to commit yourself to practicing these disciplines. I want to challenge  you to CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY!!!

Video: Amazing Grace - By Il Divo

I think this should be the "Christian Anthem."

His Grace is Truly Amazing.

Have you stopped to consider that the Son Of God, The Creator of Heaven and Earth, humbled himself in coming to live amongst us, sinful creature, and DIED FOR YOU AT THE CROSS!!!

This is the same God that Louie Giglio talks about in the video I shared a few weeks ago!! (See Louie Giglio on The Star Maker)

This is the infinite God that holds the entire universe in the palm of his hand, that created EVERYTHING by the sheer power of his spoken word!!

THAT IS TRULY AMAZING!!

How To Be Happy, Part 7

Obedience.

I remember that I used  to be grounded a lot when I was growing up. I don't know about you, but  that was not, and continues not to be, my idea of happiness. Well, now  I am older, and beyond the authority of my earthly parents. They have lost  their ability to discipline (and sometimes punish) me, but I am still not  grown up. Nobody ever stops "growing up." So, instead of my parents,  it is God the one who disciplines me now.

"For the Lord disciplines  the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives." Hebrews  12:6, ESV (and Proverbs 3:12.)

So far, we have talked about focusing on  Him, and living in thanksgiving towards him. Well, you can do those  all day long, but if you disobey, you will cause God to exert His discipline  upon you. That does not yield a happy life.

If you discipline yourself,  God won't have to!

God gave us His commandments, in part, so we may know  how sinful we are and how much we need Him. Additionally, I fervently believe  that he gave them to us as blueprint of how to live our lives in a fulfilling  way, in the optimal way.

He created us. He created this world. He gave  us life. Don't you think that He might have a better idea of how to live  this life than we do?

Those who go out of their way to fight and disobey  his commandments, only work towards building a life of misery and dissatisfaction  for themselves. And God will let them!!

Have you read the Sermon on the  Mount lately? If we go through life judging other, we are only judging  ourselves and making our own lives miserable. If we go through life relying  on what other's think about us in order to feel good about ourselves, we  will be unstable, people pleasing, miserable, creatures.

All the commandments  given in the bible, whether in the Sermon on the Mount, in the Old Testament,  or elsewhere, were given with one goal in mind, to show you the way towards  leading a happy, healthy, and long life.

"I will instruct you and  teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon  you. Be not like a horse or a mule, without understanding, which must be  curbed with bit and bridle, or it will not stay near you." Psalm 32:  8-9, ESV

How To Be Happy, Part 6

Does God want you to be happy?

Life is not all fun and games, life is full of pain, fear, and unpleasantness, so lets look at scripture and think about this together.

Lets think about heaven. Heaven is supposed to be the perfect place, with unimaginable joy, no tears, no pain, no sickness, no fear, no stress, no hunger, no thirst, nothing that is bad, and everything that is great and enjoyable in infinite amounts. God intends us to live in this condition for the rest of eternity. Why would he want us to live in misery right now?

The answer is, he does not. However, because of sin, this world has been corrupted and these "undesirable" factors are now an unquestionable reality.

The bible is full of promises. God promised perfect peace to those who keep their focus on Him (Isaiah 26:3, Philippians 4:4-7). God promised to sustain us, and provide for us, and protect us. God promised us that everything would work out (Romans 8:28). Why would he promise all those things?

He promised those things because he knows and understand the difficulties of this life. He gave us those promises so we can trust in him during the difficult times. So that, in that trust, we can release control of those things, along with the fear, worry, and anxiety associated with them, to him and enjoy our lives in the midst of the though times.

I do not remember worrying about bills very much when I was younger. I was very aware of our need for shelter, clothing, and food, but I had complete trust that my parents would take care of it and nothing would be lacking. It never occurred to me that they would fail and we would find ourselves in need. Nowadays, however, it seems that all I do is worry about bills and finances.

If I can have such absolute trust in my earthly parents, why can't I trust my infinite, all-loving, all powerful, heavenly father for the same things now? This is part of having that child-like faith that Jesus mentioned.

The first step towards enjoying your life is believing in God, and believing God!!

It is not enough to believe He exists; we also have to believe that He will do the things that he has promised!

Believe that God wants you to be happy and enjoy your life!!

Stay tuned, there is still more Happiness coming up.

Let's Grow Together!!!

How To Be Happy, Part 5

Thanksgiving continued.

A couple  of weeks ago, I gave my son a balloon, a huge, "happy birthday,"  balloon. It was not his birthday. It was the birthday of one of the guys  at the office, but knowing how much my son loves balloons, I asked if I  could keep the helium-filled item and take it home for him.

My son received  the gift with a somewhat detached reaction at the unexpected gift. It took  him a while to start playing with it. When he finally did, he played with  it delicately and softly. After a while, however, his boyish self came  out and he started treating it with the roughness associated with eighteen  months old boys. My heart cringed at this. "I hope he makes it last"  was my comment to my wife. She wisely pointed out that I should let him  enjoy it in whichever way he wanted.

Have you had anything like this happen  to you? Have you ever given someone a gift and were not appreciated in  return?

I must admit that I had anticipated great excitement and thanksgiving  from his part when receiving the gift. So I was slightly disappointed when  he did not express as much excitement as I thought was due. I did not feel  appreciated.

God gives us gifts in the same way. They are unexpected gifts,  out of his selfless love for us. Now, besides the fact that God has perfect  expectations because he already knows what we call "the future;" how do you thing HE feels when He gives us gifts that go, at best, unappreciated  and, at worst, treated with contempt?

Do you express gratitude for the  gifts he gives you? Do you take care of them?

Taking good care of the  gifts he gives us is one way we can show appreciation towards Him. The  bible refers to this as "stewardship." Are you a good steward  of your body, your health, your mind, your time, your family, your friends,  your finances, etc?

It is important to take time to think about what He  does for you, thank Him, and show appreciation to Him by taking good care  of what He gives you. These disciplines will not only help you develop  greater trust and intimacy with Him, they will also help you start focusing  on what you DO have, instead of what you DO NOT have.

Join us next time  as we venture beyond the topic of thanksgiving, and onto other aspects  of How to Be Happy!

Lets Grow Together!!!

How to Be Happy, Part 4

Thanksgiving.

My wife bought a book  with 101 things to be thankful for. It was a very simple and small book,  but I learned one important lesson from it. One of the entries in the book  read something like this:

"Thank you God that I have dishes to wash."

This  short statement made a big impact on the way I look at thanksgiving. How  often do I complain about a dirty house, instead of thanking Him that I  have a house to clean and I do not live in a homeless shelter or under  a bridge?

How often do I complain about the tremendous effort of mowing  the yard every week, instead of thanking him for giving me a huge yard  where my children will be able to play, and grow, and have fun?

How often  do I complain that my wife cannot read my mind and do things the way I  want them to be done, instead of thanking him that He has given me the  most amazing woman I have ever met as my helpmate, companion, and friend?  If truth were told, she is a great tool that God uses to point out just  how selfish and self-centered I am. How often do you think I have thanked  him for that?

Thank you Lord for using my wife to reveal my sinfulness  to me, to show me how selfish and self-centered I am!!

Well, that is one.

Now  it is your turn. What have you been complaining about that you should have  been thanking Him for?

The simple habit of turning every complaint into  a prayer of thanksgiving could change your life!

I'll see you next time,  when we will continue this series on How To Be Happy!!

Lets Grow Together!!!

How to be Happy, Part 3

Thanksgiving.

Last time we looked  at Philippians 4:4-8, and said that one of the keys to being happy in life  is keeping our focus on Him. Lets think about that scripture some more.

"Rejoice  in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness  be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything,  but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your  requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all  understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally,  brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever  is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence,  if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Philippians 4:4-8, ESV

Today I wanted to share with you the importance  of being thankful in all things, of praying with thanksgiving, which requires  faith, but can be a tremendous peace-inducing discipline in your life.

The  scripture above says that in everything, by prayer and supplication, with  thanksgiving, we should let our requests be made known to God. Once this  is done, the peace of God will guard our hearts in Christ. Notice that  this particular verse does not mention whether God answered our prayer  in the way we want or not!!!

It is not a matter of how God answers a prayer,  it is a matter of trusting that whatever answer he gives us, it is the  best thing for us. Therefore, thanksgiving is in order.

It is also a matter  of being thankful for what He has already done for us and given to us.  He gave us his son at the cross, as if that were not enough, he continues  to give to us. He gives us comfort. He gives us the ability to work and  produce and income. He guides and protects us, even if it does not feel  like it. He heals us. And he will give us an eternal habitation without  pain and filled with unthinkable joy and peace!!!

I strive to always start  my prayers with the words "Thank You." This helps me focus on  the things that He has done for me. Additionally, when making requests  of Him, it helps me keep in mind that God will answer my prayer, and whatever  his answer may be, it will be in my best interests, because that is the  kind of God we serve, one that keeps our best interests in mind. It does  take faith to thank Him for something that He has yet to do, but that is  part of the beauty of trust. And thanking Him for the things He has yet  to do can help you develop a much deeper trust in Him, reliance on Him,  and deeper sense of peace.

How often do you thank God for the things that  you have? How often do you give these things for granted, complain to God  for the things that you do not have? How often do you give thanks for the  things that you DO NOT have (such a disease)?

Think about you habit  of thanksgiving until next time, when we will continue this series on How  to Be Happy!!!

Lets Grow Together!!!

How to be Happy, Part 2

"You keep him in perfect peace  whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord  forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock." Isaiah 26:3-4,  ESV.

This scripture makes it clear that focusing on Him, and maintaining  this focus, is a key to obtaining that internal happiness that the bible  calls Joy. Note that this passage says that he who remains focused on Him,  trusts in Him. That is the key to building trust in him. The amplified  version of the bible gives a little more insight into this concept.

"You  will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace  whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because  he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in  You. So trust in the Lord (commit yourself to Him, lean on Him, hope  confidently in Him) forever; for the Lord God is an everlasting Rock [the  Rock of Ages]." Isaiah 26:3-4, AMP.

I have heard it said, "If the  ground under your feet is shaking, you are standing on the wrong thing!" If your life is shaking, you are building your life on, and trusting, the  wrong things!

If you are trusting money, then you will be shaken every  time you face a financial challenge or situation at work. If you trust  in relationships and people, then you will be shaken when those people  let you down. Jesus is the only unshakable foundation!!

This same concept  of focusing on Him, can be found in the famous Philippians passage quoted  below. Let's take a look at it.

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again  I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The  Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by  prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known  to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard  your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever  is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever  is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there  is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Philippians  4:4-8, ESV.

Note that, in this case, we are commanded to rejoice in Him.  So rejoicing is actually a choice. Additionally, notice the relationship  between being focused on Him, maintaining a lifestyle of continual communication  with Him in prayer and thanksgiving, and our thought life.

You can choose  to be Happy. As a matter of fact, you are commanded to be happy. If you  want to be happy, or filled with joy, you need to start focusing your thoughts  on Him, on His goodness, on His magnificence, on His love for you, on His  power, on His infinite nature.

Join us next time as we continue studying  Happiness and how to achieve it in our lives.

How to be Happy, Part 1

People use the word "Happy" in different ways nowadays. Do a quick dictionary search and you'll see how true that is.

Around Christian circles, the word happy has taken the meaning of being an external quality where everything is as you would like it to be. Whereas Joy is the internal counterpart.The English dictionary, however, indicates that these words are synonyms.

It is an unfortunate fact that life on this earth cannot be perfect. That opportunity was lost at the fall. However, the internal, or mental/emotional, aspect of happiness may still be partially achievable.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit" Romans 15:13, NIV

In the verse above, the bible makes it clear that we can be filled with all joy and peace. In other words, being as happy as any human being could ever be, but how do you arrive at that internal happiness.

If you read the passage carefully, you'll notice that it is an incremental process. The passage states that as we trust in God, he will fill us with peace and joy. So, the more we trust Him, the more peace and joy we are filled with.

Happiness found in trusting Jesus

It can be concluded that happiness is a mental and emotional state that God produces in us as we discipline ourselves to trust Him more and grow closer to Him.

So, how do we grow in our trust for God? What disciplines help us trust Him more?

We'll talk about that next time!!

In the mean time, please share with us what is it that helps YOU trust in HIM more!!!

Let's Grow Together!!

Video: Louie Giglio on the Star Maker

We serve an amazing God!!!

Have you thought about how awesome our God is? Have you thought of how powerful He is?

It is encouraging to think about the greatness of God in the midst of our troubles. This amazing God, who holds the universe in the palm of His hand, loves us with an infinite Love that is way beyond anything that we could ever imagine.

Whatever you are going through right now, He is bigger, and He does have everything under his control.  I hope this video helps you put your life, problems, and heartaches in the right perspective... He truly is worthy of our worship and Praise!!

How to Forgive

"For if you forgive people their  trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them  go, and giving up resentment], your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive others their trespasses [their reckless  and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment],  neither will your Father forgive you your trespasses." Matthew 6:14-15,  AMP

I was treated rudely today by someone  that I come into contact on a regular basis. This person reacted to something  that I said in a rude and condescending way that caused me to feel belittled  and insulted.

I was upset for approximately one  and a half hours, which means that I was not enjoying my life and my day  during that amount of time. I am tempted to say that it was a waste of  time, but this would not be true. This was not a waste of time because  I grew a little today; I learned about the importance of forgiving others  quickly and how to do it. This will help me in future instances where forgiveness  is needed.

Being angry at that person was  not productive, it did not help me in any way. I was consumed thinking  about myself and how the comment was inappropriate and wrong. It was not  until the Lord led me to start praying bout the situation and change my  focus from myself to Him, that progress could be made. The Lord lead me  to think about forgiving him and letting the offense go. This, however,  did not happen instantly.

The forgiveness process I went  through today was as follows:

1. Got Hurt
2. Got Angry
3. Starter praying about it
4. Experienced the presence of  God, his love, comfort, and healing.
5. Was able to forgive and let  go.

Hurts and offenses can help us  draw closer to God. As His healing presence ministers to us, we become  closer and more like Him. It is only after the wound has been healed by  Him that we can truly forgive and let go of the offense. If I had turned  to Him sooner, I would not have spent almost one hour and a half of my  day in emotional turmoil.

This is only an example of what  happened to me today. I have gone through this process before, with much  greater hurts and pains that I have experienced. In those instances, the  process took much longer than just a few minutes.

Regardless of the magnitude of  the pain or offense, ultimately there is only one way to truly forgive  someone. That way is to let God's love and his understanding flow through  us. As we draw closer to him, forgiving will become easier and easier.

What would happen if we lived,  walked, and had our being in his presence? How would it affect the way  we react to hurtful, offensive, or threatening situations?

enCOURAGE - Launch Announcement

It has become more and more evident  to me that encouragement is sorely needed. I have noticed this in my personal  life as well as other's.

I noticed that when I am encouraging  myself by reading scripture, listening to encouraging, inspiring, and motivational  material, well... I feel encouraged. Overall, my relationship with Christ  and walk is better, I lead a better life, get along with others better,  and I am of better service to the body of Christ and the lost.

When I do not take care of encouraging  myself, I quickly become depressed, negative, angry, tired, selfish, etc.

"If you have hope in the future,  you will have power in the present." John C. Maxwell

I have observed that some of the  most popular teacher and speakers out there focus mainly on encouraging  people. So, why are they so popular?

They are popular because they are  filling a great need of the people. People need encouragement, and they  are providing it.

However, a lot of this encouragement  is either biblically skewed or aimed at business people in the secular  world.

That is why I wanted to start the  enCOURAGE project, here at Every Day In Christ. The goal of the project  is to provide Encouraging, Faith-inducing, Hope-producing, Biblical, Christ-centered  material. This will not be a theology class or bible study, and is not  meant to replace your personal time of bible study and prayer!!! However,  it is meant to be focused on how great God is, and how great his  love for us is, and his mercy, and justice, and everyone of his infinite  characteristics.

It could be in the form of Bible  verses, videos, mp3's, quotes, articles, personal testimonials, pictures,  historical references, links, pdf's, or whatever other format may  inspire, encourage and uplift you, me and others. Hopefully, overtime,  we will amass a huge collection of Christian inspiration to suite everyone's  needs, and will become a one-stop-shop for healthy Christian encouragement!!

The idea is that you visit this  site often and go through the material on a regular basis, encouraging  yourself to grow closer to Christ and continue persevering in this race.  On the same note, I want you to go and find encouragement from any other  resources you can, and share it with us so we can enCOURAGE (give courage  to) one another.

Visit the enCOURAGE page and start  giving and receiving courage TODAY!!!

How to deal with Failure in a Productive and Encouraging Way, Part 3

I deal with failure regularly.

For example, I tend to respond  in an aggressive or mean way to certain situations, and I've been working  at changing this reaction for a more peaceful, and Christ-like, one.

This is a goal that has been given  to me by God, and is very biblical. It actually happened yesterday,  so it is fresh in my mind. However, by focusing on "improving"  rather than "mastering," I have been able to progressively improve  the way I respond to such events.

I did not handle the situation  perfectly yesterday. However, I also did not handle it like I would have  a year ago. Similarly, my failure rate at handling difficult situation  peacefully has been decreasing, which is a sign of improvement. There is  definitely room for progress, but progress has been made.

Little by little, I'll get to the  point where God and I are both satisfied with the way in which I respond  to these events, through perseverance.

Lord, help us understand that you  died at the cross for us, because we are sinful and imperfect. Help us  understand that we can trust in your sacrifice instead of trying to obtain  perfection. Help us see each failure as an opportunity to reach closer  to you, to receive more of your grace, to grow and learn.

Help us in our way to becoming  the men and women of God that you want us to be, to bless the world by  shining brightly for you. Help us to get back up, knowing that you are  leading us, helping us, and strengthening us. Help us enjoy the journey,  one day at a time, including the opportunities to get back up and try again.

How to deal with Failure in a Productive and Encouraging Way, Part 2

I use this process to analyze my failures:

1. Is this goal something that  God wants me to pursue?
This should always be the first  question. Goals and change should always be pursued following the leadership  of Christ. Otherwise, we could end up pursuing the wrong thing, and find  ourselves further away from God, and in deep trouble.
Your failure may very well be God  telling you that a change of goals is needed. What does the bible say about  your goal? Have you prayed about it?

2. Did I invest 100% of my efforts  and resources into it?
If the answer is "Yes,"  then there is a lack of knowledge and/or skill, so the next step would  be to ask someone for feedback and instruction. Maybe I am missing  a detail and need someone to show me what it is. Maybe I need more practice  at the specific thing and need to continue persevering and improving little  by little.

If the answer is "No"  then you have found the reason for the failure and now you have the chance  to try again, giving your 100%.

3. Is this a reasonable goal?
Goals need to be challenging and  force us to grow, but they also need to be humanly possible. A lot of people,  myself included, have unreasonable expectations of themselves. This is  very unhealthy. If you find yourself wanting to perform perfectly, or to  master a skill in an unreasonable amount of time, then the goal needs to  be modified.

If you wanted to become a concert  pianist, a lot of time and practice would be needed. This cannot be achieved  overnight. The same is true with any other skill. Instead of setting the  goal to "master" the skill or trait, set a goal to "improve" your performance by a specific amount.

4. Review the progress that  was made.
Look at how far you have come,  how much you have grown, what you have learned. Even though you might have  come short from the expected result, you still DID something, you LEARNED  something and, as you continue trying, it will become easier and easier,  until you finally achieve your goal.

If anything, at least you would  have discovered one way that does not work, so you'll know to avoid that  in the future.

5. Finally, it is important  to understand that regardless of the goals we set or the progress we make  either morally or physically, it will not help us achieve salvation. Salvation  only comes through Faith in Christ, nothing else. Earning salvation is  impossible. So, if you are saved, relax, take a deep breath, your eternity  is secure.

How to deal with Failure in a Productive and Encouraging Way, Part 1

"To those who by patient persistence  in well-doing [springing from piety] seek [unseen but sure] glory and honor  and [the eternal blessedness of] immortality, He will give eternal life" Romans 2:7, AMP

It is very important to have a  good method to understanding and dealing with failure. Otherwise, our sinful  nature will cause us to become discouraged, frustrated, and depressed when  we fail at any given task that we set ourselves out to achieve.

Whether it is to overcome sin,  master a character trait, learn a new skill, or accomplish a task, failure  can either empower you to continue learning and growing, or motivate you  to quit and depress you.

The first step in dealing with  failure in an uplifting and empowering way is understanding that failure  is an opportunity to grow and learn. If we do not learn from our mistakes,  only then have we truly failed.

The movie "Meet the Robinsons"  brings this point home in a great way. At one point during the movie the  main Character, a child genius who would grow to become a great leader  and inventor, fails at fixing a little device at the dinner table, in front  of a handful of people. Immediately after his failure, the small crowd  breaks out in cheers to celebrate this "great failure" of his.  People involved in the celebration then explain that failure is part of  the road towards success. They end the encouragement with the phrase "keep  moving forwards," and a food fight. The moral of the story is:

Every failure is an opportunity  to learn.
You get more than one chance  to succeed!
You can always try again!
So,
KEEP MOVING FORWARD!!

Once you understand that failures  become opportunities. The next step is to analyze your failure in order  to improve on your results. Stay tuned, because I will share the process  I use to analyze my failures in tomorrow's post!!

The Way to a Great Life

Would you like to have a GREAT life?

I do too!

So I continually look to those that have lead great lives to learn from them. Several years ago I came across Zig Ziglar and have been learning from him ever since.

Zig is  a Christian motivational speaker who focuses on teaching people personal  success in all areas of life. I have read and listened to some of his books and, if you  noticed my blogroll, I also subscribe to his blog and podcasts.

A main theme that he emphasizes  through his teaching is the importance of helping others. If you listen  to him or read his books, you will inevitably come across this quote:

"You can have everything in  life you want, if you will just help enough other people get what they  want." Zig Ziglar

Being focused on self will lead  you to being focused on what you want, what you have and, inevitably, what  you do NOT have. These things that you do not have will then become a priority,  because you are your own priority. Naturally, it will follow that you will  want to obtain these things.

Now, these things could be material,  such as money or cars and such, emotional, such as happiness or peace or  the benefits associated with relationships, or of a more intangible nature,  such as power or influence.

There is nothing wrong with any  of these. The problem is that, once you obtain these things, they will  soon become the norm, boring, and mundane. This will then lead you to a  different set of other "things" to obtain and, once you obtain  those, then another set, and another set. This will create a negative cycle  that will leave you unfulfilled, frustrated, and potentially addicted.

Today, I want to and suggest to  you that the way to a great life is being others-focused. I want  to encourage you to trust in Christ for your needs and focus on letting  him express his love and compassion to others through you!!

Video: Sweetly Broken - Jeremy Riddle

Have you surrendered your  life to Christ?

Surrendering your life to Christ is not a one time event. We surrender our lives to him every time we decide to follow him instead of going our own way. And we have a faithful God that forgives us and receives us back with his arms wide open every time that we fail to surrender ourselves to Him and repent.

How Great is our God!!!



Lord, help us surrender our lives to you. Help us live lives that bring glory to you, let our every breath be an expression of worship and praise that pleases your heart and draws us, as well as others, closer to you!!!

Thank you for how amazing you are, and how great your love for us is!!!

Loving The Un-Lovable

Did you ever run into someone that truly disgusted you? Someone that you truly hated and could never possibly like, much less love? What about someone that you found highly uncomfortable to be around? Do you work with anyone like that? Are you married to someone like that?

If so, where is this difference? Where does it lie? We are all sinners, not because of what we do, because of WHO WE ARE! It is in our nature. Some of us, however, have learned to sin in a way that is more socially acceptable and have successfully deluded ourselves into thinking that we are somehow better than those people that sin in a way generally perceived as offensive or "evil."

I bathe every day, I shave two times a week, and I do not use foul language or indulge in drunkenness or drugs. I even go to church almost every week! Does this make me a better person than the dirty, drunken, homeless, smelly, thieving, lying, guy that asked you for money on the streets pretending that it was for food but potentially intending to buy more alcohol, tobacco, or drugs with it?

Just because I do not sin in the same way he does, or look better kept than him, or have addictions that are considered socially acceptable, it does not mean that I am better than he is.

As a matter of fact, the opposite is potentially true. The book "The Prodigal God" goes into great detail about this very subject. This book does an outstanding job at explaining this point by studying the parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32).

In this parable, even though the older, righteous, brother does everything right and properly, he does not make it into the "party." On the other hand, the materialistic, selfish, eating-with-pigs, younger brother repents and turns back. He is received with great joy and celebration while the righteous brother is left outside!!!

So what is the difference between these two brother?

The older brother was self-righteous; the younger was just selfish. The younger brother knew that what he was doing was wrong, and was able to repent when he finally came to his sense. The older brother didn't have the opportunity to repent because he believed that what he was doing was right, but it was not.

So, in a sense, we can say that God preferred to fellowship with the filthy, sinful, younger brother than with the self-righteous one.

Today I want to challenge you to inspect your prejudices. Do you think you are better than others, even if they are "addicted", "sinful", "disgusting", or even "evil" people? How does God think about them?

If you had a choice, which one of the two brothers would you rather be? Which one do you actually resemble the most? Keep in mind that neither of them was particularly "less sinful" than the other.

I encourage you to start thinking about others in the same way that God thinks about them. If you do not know how he sees them, ask Him. He will answer!!

Lord, thank you for your goodness and love. Help us extend mercy, compassion, and love to everyone we come into contact with. Help us see our prejudices and judgments, and help up look at others through your eyes, specially those people that we find particularly "sinful", disturbing, or disgusting. Help us be like you towards everyone.

Joy in the Presence of God

"You make known to me the path of life; in your  presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore." Psalm 16:11, ESV

I have spoken before about walking in the  presence of God. The first time I was introduced to this concept, it was  through a book called "The Practice of the Presence of God."  The Wikipedia article on this book uses two quotes from the book to summarize, in a very effective way, the  general ideal of the concept.

"That he had always been governed by  love, without selfish views; and that having resolved to make the love  of GOD the end of all his actions, he had found reasons to be well satisfied  with his method. That he was pleased when he could take up a straw from  the ground for the love of GOD, seeking Him only, and nothing else, not  even His gifts."

"That in order to form a habit of conversing  with GOD continually, and referring all we do to Him; we must at first  apply to Him with some diligence: but that after a little care we should  find His love inwardly excite us to it without any difficulty."

According to the Psalm quoted above, there  are two great benefits to developing this continual sense of the presence  of God. The first is the a sense of joy to accompany us through our days  here on earth. The second refers to the everlasting pleasures that we will  experience in Heaven. I think these benefits are enough motivation to pursue  this quality. However, I must admit that I have not applied the initial  diligence that Brother Lawrence mentioned in his book.

This psalm is definitely not the only place  in scripture that this concept appears. Similar concepts can be found at  other places that seem to imply the same sense of continual communication  and focus on Christ. Here are a few more:

"You keep him in perfect peace whose  mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." Isaiah  26:3, ESV (emphasis added)

"Rejoice always, pray without  ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is  the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18,  ESV (emphasis added)

"do not be anxious about anything,  but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let  your requests be made known to God." Philippians 4:6, ESV (emphasis  added)

Is there any other quality that the Christian  could pursue that is more important than maintaining open and continual  communication with his master?

Praying In Jesus' Name

I hear many prayers ended with the  staple phrase "In Jesus' name." Some of those prayers have been,  and continue to be, prayed by me, but what does it mean to pray in Jesus'  name?

"In that day you will ask nothing  of me. Truly, truly, I say to you, whatever you ask of the Father in my  name, he will give it to you. Until now you have asked nothing in my name.  Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full." John 16:23-24, ESV

I have discovered that there are  certain kinds of prayers that God will not delay in answering. Other prayers,  however, seems to go unaddressed at best or rejected at worst. What kinds  of prayer cause the father to hasten to answer?

The answer to that question is  in what has become a popular prayer ending. When Jesus said "pray  in my name" what he was actually saying was, "pray according  to my character, heart, and will."

When our prayers match the will  of God for our lives, God will hasten to answer. When our prayers are faithless,  selfish, and shallow, his answer will be "NO."

A few years ago, I went through  and old testament survey class. In this particular class, the instructor  was talking about the incident of the golden calf in the wilderness and  idolatry. God used the class to deeply inspire me to find the idols in  my life. I asked the Lord to show me what those idols were and, within  24 hours, my prayer had been answered.

I didn't ask God for money, or  a nice car, or a perfect life. Those types of things are very secondary  to God. God is more concerned with our hearts than he is with our outward  circumstances. In fact, he will use those undesirable outward circumstances  to work on our hearts and draw us closer to Him.

My prayer focused on God's will  for my life, the condition of my heart, and my relationship with Him. THAT  is what matters to God the most. Health, material stuff, and comfort, are  all secondary and will follow with time, as a by product. Remember, "seek  first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these {material}  things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33, ESV (contextual clarification added).

So today, I want to challenge you  to look at your heart and the things you ask him for. Ask Him to help you  reach a closer level of intimacy with him. Ask Him for the things that  He thinks are important! Do this, always, with an attitude of thanksgiving,  reverence, and worship towards Him, and watch Him transform your life!!!

Little Foxes

"Catch the foxes for us, the  little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom"  Song of Solomon 2:12, ESV

Vineyards and wine are usually  meant to represent celebration and rejoicing in the bible. In this case,  Solomon's beloved is addressing him. Even though this passage is addressing  the marital relationship, I firmly believe that it can be applied to all  aspects of life, not just marriage and sex.

So vineyards, in that sense, represents  those things in life that are enjoyable. The foxes then represent things  that are unpleasant or undesirable. Now, there are a lot of things in life  that are unpleasant, but we can not "catch" (or control) a lot  of them. At this point in my life, it represents anger, frustration, intolerance,  fear, insecurities, and such. These qualities are destroying my vineyard  one day, one event, at a time, and that is NOT acceptable.

Are you OK with these little foxes  spoiling your life? Do you let them run wild and ruing your relationships,  your marriage, your job?

Men and women have to catch their  own foxes. However, in the context of marriage, note that Solomon's beloved  asked HIM to catch the foxes "for us." It is the husband's responsibility  to do the hunting in this case, for the sake of the marriage, but what  are we hunting?

"For we do not wrestle against  flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against  the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces  of evil in the heavenly places." Ephesians 6:12, ESV

We are hunting demons! Those demons  that incite us towards selfishness, anger, pride, and every form of sin.  And how do we fight them? By reaching ever closer to Christ.

"Now the Lord is the Spirit,  and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." 2 Corinthians  3:17

Today I want to challenge you to  take a look at your heart. Do you see these forces at work within you?  Can you find any trace of selfishness, pride, anger, bitterness, or any  other form of sin there? If you are like everyone else I've ever met, you  would have answered yes to all those previous questions. If so, I encourage  you to reach out to God, ask Him for help in reaching ever closer to Him,  learning how to walk in his presence every day, in freedom!

Which comes First?

I came across the following quote:

"Day by day we should weigh  what we have granted to the spirit of the world against what we have denied  to the spirit of Jesus, in thought and especially in deed." Albert  Schweitzer.

Which produced the question; "which  one comes first the thought, or the deeds?" To answer this question,  lets take a look a couple of scriptures.

"Keep your heart with all  vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life" Proverbs 4:23, ESV

"The good person out of the  good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his  evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his  mouth speaks." Luke 6:45, ESV

The famous sermon on the mount  is another great example of the importance of the heart's attitude. Most  of this sermon deals with sin and the attitudes of the heart. The actions  that are mentioned take a level secondary importance. Jesus equates anger  to murder, lust to adultery. So I would conclude that I agree  with Mr. Schweitzer when he says that we should reflect on how much we  sow onto the sinful nature and how much we sow onto the spirit (Galatians  6:8). However, I would disagree with the concluding statement that we should  pay more attention to deeds than thoughts. I would say that we need to  pay more attention to the attitudes of our hearts, and the deeds will follow  naturally out of that.

The most important things, as a  Christian, is my relationship with God, my intimacy with Him, being "a  man after God's own heart." Once my heart is close to Jesus, actions  will follow. If you don't agree, what do you think Jesus what trying to  say in this instance?

"Now as they went on their  way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into  her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet  and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving.  And she went up to him and said, "Lord, do you not care that my sister  has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me." But the Lord  answered her, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about  many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion,  which will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:38:42, ESV

Realistic Expectations - Closing Thought

What if, instead of "expecting" or "wanting" from people, we start expecting and wanting to express Christ to everyone, specially when they don't deserve it?

Realistic Expectations From Children

Everything we have discussed so far  regarding expectations certainly applies to our children. They are broken  and sinful human being, just like you and I, and they need the same amount  of grace and patience as everyone else. However, there are additional things  to keep in mind with these little ones.

Children do not understand right  and wrong the same way mature people do. And I am using the word "mature" carefully here, because there are some grown-ups that do not understand  this very well either, but that is a different post.

Similarly, they do not have the  same capacity for though, understanding, memory, forethought as we do,  so we need to keep this in mind during our day to day interactions with them.

It is a running joke in my house  that I need to learn how to deal with children. My wife is extremely gifted  in this area; I am not. A few months after we were first married, we were  keeping my newly "acquired" three year old nephew with us for  the weekend. After telling him repeatedly to not play around the house in the way he was, I got frustrated and decided to have a "teaching  moment" with him. So, I sat him down and proceeded to ask him, with  the full expectation to get an answer from him, "why he was choosing  to behave this way." I actually sat him down and asked him that, verbatim.

The child looked at me as if I  were from a different planet. He had no idea what I was talking about.  My wife busted out laughing at me!!! The truth is that the child did not  have the capacity to remember that I had told him not to do what he was  doing. He might focus on other things for a few minutes, but after a while  he would come back to the item of interest. This is natural, children of  that age have a short attention span and need constant repetition in order  to learn a specific behavior.

On the same note, children do not  understand the concept of danger. They do not know that cars or electricity  can kill them. They do not even know what death is. They have no concept of cost, or value, or money.

It is important to understand their  capacity so, when they do something that frightens or frustrates us,  we can respond to the situation out of our understanding, instead of personalizing  their actions as disobedience, neglect, carelessness, etc., and reacting in anger.

Understanding their limitations  and the developmental stages of children will allow you to set realistic  expectations for your child. And it will also allow you to help them grow,  learn, and discipline them in a more effective way. You will be able to  interpret what they do, or don't do, not as an act of rebellion, but as  a natural part of growing. Having realistic expectations will not also  help you be a better parent and teacher, but it will also allow you to have  a greater level of peace in your daily interaction with them.

When raising children, it is also  important to take into consideration their personalities, strengths, and  weaknesses in order to set realistic expectations for them. Every child  is different, so the expectation you set for each child should be different  as well.

Realistic Expectations from Yourself

After looking at the expectations  we have of everyone else, it is important to look at the expectations we  put on ourselves.

There are two different  groups of people, those that expect too much of themselves, and those that  are too lenient and expect too little of themselves. I fall in the group  that has unrealistically high expectations of oneself. I expect perfection  and, when I do not achieve it, I beat myself down. This is a very unhealthy  and self-destructive habit.

Neither of these groups are healthy,  and they both have their own risks and consequences. Therefore, it is important  to understand that we need to set reasonable expectations for ourselves.  No one can be uplifting and encouraging 100% of the time. Likewise, no  one can be peaceful and Christ-like at all times, or know exactly what  to say or do, but what about 80% of the time? or 70%?

I think  it is possible to get to the point where we are content 80% of the time,  or at peace, or joyful, or loving and accepting towards other, or humble,  or Christ-like. Naturally, we can not get to this point of our own accords,  we need God' grace, leadership, and strength to accomplish this. The good  new is that God does want us to get to this point.

The other 20% or 30% is where we  need God's grace in the form of forgiveness. It is those times that we  need to humble ourselves, ask God to help us do better, and thank him for  His sacrifice at the cross and his forgiveness. It is also at those points  that we are reminded of how much we need him, and we should learn to thank  him for keeping us humble. Remember Paul's thorn?

"So to keep me from becoming  conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn  was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me  from becoming conceited." 2 Corinthians 12:7, ESV

I do not believe God wants us to  achieve perfection during our stay here on earth. He did not believe this  was possible (Philippians 2:6, 1 John 1:8), but He does want us to go through  the sanctification process, even if it is for some partial level of improvement  (Hebrews 6:1). The times in life when we go through difficulties or fall  short are meant to draw us closer to Him, to help us build greater intimacy  with Him, to keep us humble so we can minister to others effectively and, when time comes, we will make it into that  promised land without pain, or tears, or hunger, or thirst (James 1:1-18).

Embrace the fact that you are a  sinful creature and you need his grace and forgiveness as much as anyone  else. Forgive others. Forgive yourself. Strive to live a life that is,  for the most part, free from bondage, free to love and be loved, full of  righteousness, self control, and the other aspects of Christian freedom.  All of these flowing from your intimacy and relationship with Christ, but  not necessarily a perfect life.