How to deal with Failure in a Productive and Encouraging Way, Part 3

I deal with failure regularly.

For example, I tend to respond  in an aggressive or mean way to certain situations, and I've been working  at changing this reaction for a more peaceful, and Christ-like, one.

This is a goal that has been given  to me by God, and is very biblical. It actually happened yesterday,  so it is fresh in my mind. However, by focusing on "improving"  rather than "mastering," I have been able to progressively improve  the way I respond to such events.

I did not handle the situation  perfectly yesterday. However, I also did not handle it like I would have  a year ago. Similarly, my failure rate at handling difficult situation  peacefully has been decreasing, which is a sign of improvement. There is  definitely room for progress, but progress has been made.

Little by little, I'll get to the  point where God and I are both satisfied with the way in which I respond  to these events, through perseverance.

Lord, help us understand that you  died at the cross for us, because we are sinful and imperfect. Help us  understand that we can trust in your sacrifice instead of trying to obtain  perfection. Help us see each failure as an opportunity to reach closer  to you, to receive more of your grace, to grow and learn.

Help us in our way to becoming  the men and women of God that you want us to be, to bless the world by  shining brightly for you. Help us to get back up, knowing that you are  leading us, helping us, and strengthening us. Help us enjoy the journey,  one day at a time, including the opportunities to get back up and try again.

How to deal with Failure in a Productive and Encouraging Way, Part 2

I use this process to analyze my failures:

1. Is this goal something that  God wants me to pursue?
This should always be the first  question. Goals and change should always be pursued following the leadership  of Christ. Otherwise, we could end up pursuing the wrong thing, and find  ourselves further away from God, and in deep trouble.
Your failure may very well be God  telling you that a change of goals is needed. What does the bible say about  your goal? Have you prayed about it?

2. Did I invest 100% of my efforts  and resources into it?
If the answer is "Yes,"  then there is a lack of knowledge and/or skill, so the next step would  be to ask someone for feedback and instruction. Maybe I am missing  a detail and need someone to show me what it is. Maybe I need more practice  at the specific thing and need to continue persevering and improving little  by little.

If the answer is "No"  then you have found the reason for the failure and now you have the chance  to try again, giving your 100%.

3. Is this a reasonable goal?
Goals need to be challenging and  force us to grow, but they also need to be humanly possible. A lot of people,  myself included, have unreasonable expectations of themselves. This is  very unhealthy. If you find yourself wanting to perform perfectly, or to  master a skill in an unreasonable amount of time, then the goal needs to  be modified.

If you wanted to become a concert  pianist, a lot of time and practice would be needed. This cannot be achieved  overnight. The same is true with any other skill. Instead of setting the  goal to "master" the skill or trait, set a goal to "improve" your performance by a specific amount.

4. Review the progress that  was made.
Look at how far you have come,  how much you have grown, what you have learned. Even though you might have  come short from the expected result, you still DID something, you LEARNED  something and, as you continue trying, it will become easier and easier,  until you finally achieve your goal.

If anything, at least you would  have discovered one way that does not work, so you'll know to avoid that  in the future.

5. Finally, it is important  to understand that regardless of the goals we set or the progress we make  either morally or physically, it will not help us achieve salvation. Salvation  only comes through Faith in Christ, nothing else. Earning salvation is  impossible. So, if you are saved, relax, take a deep breath, your eternity  is secure.

How to deal with Failure in a Productive and Encouraging Way, Part 1

"To those who by patient persistence  in well-doing [springing from piety] seek [unseen but sure] glory and honor  and [the eternal blessedness of] immortality, He will give eternal life" Romans 2:7, AMP

It is very important to have a  good method to understanding and dealing with failure. Otherwise, our sinful  nature will cause us to become discouraged, frustrated, and depressed when  we fail at any given task that we set ourselves out to achieve.

Whether it is to overcome sin,  master a character trait, learn a new skill, or accomplish a task, failure  can either empower you to continue learning and growing, or motivate you  to quit and depress you.

The first step in dealing with  failure in an uplifting and empowering way is understanding that failure  is an opportunity to grow and learn. If we do not learn from our mistakes,  only then have we truly failed.

The movie "Meet the Robinsons"  brings this point home in a great way. At one point during the movie the  main Character, a child genius who would grow to become a great leader  and inventor, fails at fixing a little device at the dinner table, in front  of a handful of people. Immediately after his failure, the small crowd  breaks out in cheers to celebrate this "great failure" of his.  People involved in the celebration then explain that failure is part of  the road towards success. They end the encouragement with the phrase "keep  moving forwards," and a food fight. The moral of the story is:

Every failure is an opportunity  to learn.
You get more than one chance  to succeed!
You can always try again!
So,
KEEP MOVING FORWARD!!

Once you understand that failures  become opportunities. The next step is to analyze your failure in order  to improve on your results. Stay tuned, because I will share the process  I use to analyze my failures in tomorrow's post!!