Realistic Expectations from Yourself

After looking at the expectations  we have of everyone else, it is important to look at the expectations we  put on ourselves.

There are two different  groups of people, those that expect too much of themselves, and those that  are too lenient and expect too little of themselves. I fall in the group  that has unrealistically high expectations of oneself. I expect perfection  and, when I do not achieve it, I beat myself down. This is a very unhealthy  and self-destructive habit.

Neither of these groups are healthy,  and they both have their own risks and consequences. Therefore, it is important  to understand that we need to set reasonable expectations for ourselves.  No one can be uplifting and encouraging 100% of the time. Likewise, no  one can be peaceful and Christ-like at all times, or know exactly what  to say or do, but what about 80% of the time? or 70%?

I think  it is possible to get to the point where we are content 80% of the time,  or at peace, or joyful, or loving and accepting towards other, or humble,  or Christ-like. Naturally, we can not get to this point of our own accords,  we need God' grace, leadership, and strength to accomplish this. The good  new is that God does want us to get to this point.

The other 20% or 30% is where we  need God's grace in the form of forgiveness. It is those times that we  need to humble ourselves, ask God to help us do better, and thank him for  His sacrifice at the cross and his forgiveness. It is also at those points  that we are reminded of how much we need him, and we should learn to thank  him for keeping us humble. Remember Paul's thorn?

"So to keep me from becoming  conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn  was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me  from becoming conceited." 2 Corinthians 12:7, ESV

I do not believe God wants us to  achieve perfection during our stay here on earth. He did not believe this  was possible (Philippians 2:6, 1 John 1:8), but He does want us to go through  the sanctification process, even if it is for some partial level of improvement  (Hebrews 6:1). The times in life when we go through difficulties or fall  short are meant to draw us closer to Him, to help us build greater intimacy  with Him, to keep us humble so we can minister to others effectively and, when time comes, we will make it into that  promised land without pain, or tears, or hunger, or thirst (James 1:1-18).

Embrace the fact that you are a  sinful creature and you need his grace and forgiveness as much as anyone  else. Forgive others. Forgive yourself. Strive to live a life that is,  for the most part, free from bondage, free to love and be loved, full of  righteousness, self control, and the other aspects of Christian freedom.  All of these flowing from your intimacy and relationship with Christ, but  not necessarily a perfect life.