How To Be Peaceful

"Turn away from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it." Psalm 34:14, ESV

Peace is something that everyone wants but not many have. The psalm quoted above clearly states that if we want to have peace in our lives we must be intentional in our pursuit of it.These two verses below are a good blueprint for how to seek and pursue peace in our hearts and lives.

"The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks."Luke 6:45, ESV

"Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life." Galatians 6:7, 8 ESV

When I think about peace, three different aspects of my life comes to mind: the internal, the circumstantial, and the interpersonal.

The internal aspect of peace is what happens within myself. Specifically, it is how I think and feel about myself. It is important to accept who God made you to be. It is important to stop trying to be like everyone else and be yourself. God made you the way you are for a reason. He has a plan for your life: EMBRACE IT!! Similarly, it is also important to understand and accept that you are not, and never will be, perfect. Life is a journey of growing ever closer to God, of changing, of expanding your comfort zone, of continual learning. Embrace this aspect of life, and be gracious towards yourself for not being perfect. Adopt the attitude that Joyce Meyer expresses in the following quote towards yourself and your life.

“I may not be where I need to be but I thank God I am not where I used to be.” Joyce Meyer

The circumstantial aspect of peace has to do with life events. Whether it is a health condition, financial, or family situation, it is important to understand two things about external circumstances:

1. We all make mistakes and get into situations that eventually become overwhelming and require "rescuing" from. This is part of why we are called "sheep" in the bible. Sheep are continually getting into trouble from which they cannot save themselves. We do the same thing. So, trust that your Shepherd will come to your rescue, even when you get yourself in trouble!!

2. There are aspects of life that we cannot control. Things will happen that we cannot prevent and can do nothing to resolve. When this happens, you have two options. You can either freak out, stress out, and gain nothing from it, or you can accept them for what they are and trust that your Shepherd will rescue you from this one as well.

Either way, trusting in the wisdom, power, and loving kindness of your father/shepherd/rescuer/lover of your soul, is a fundamental aspect of living a life in peace. That is why He says that "the righteous shall live by faith."

The third aspect of peace, the interpersonal, has to do with our relationships with others. Whether it is family, friends, co-workers or classmates, difficulties will arise. Difficulties will even arise with complete strangers in unexpected ways. For example, have you ever been cut-off in traffic by a reckless driver that decided to do something dangerous and put you and your family at risk? This can be quite disturbing. People are imperfect, sinful, selfish, etc., and this will cause difficulties, disagreements, and strife. It is important to make love, grace, wisdom, and humility the centerpiece of the way in which you interact with others. It is just as important to trust that God will protect you from the poor decisions that others make, just as He will protect others from your (or my) poor decisions!!

Living in peace, at whichever level, always requires trusting in God and listening to His advice and wisdom. As we stated earlier, in order to obtain peace, you must be intentional about your pursuit of it. You need to start sowing seeds of peace into all three aspects of you life: the way you see and think about yourself, the way you perceive the world, and your relationships with others.

Are you sowing peace, love, and faith into your heart and life, or are you sowing something else?

Sticks and Stones

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"

You have heard that saying before. You have probably also heard people disagree with it in resent years. I have to admit that it bothers me when I hear people disagree with that (non biblical) proverb. It is not that I think they are wrong in their disagreement; it's just that they have taken the saying out of context. The phrase is not incorrect; it is just incomplete. Additionally, it was originally deviced as a means to teach children how to react to insults. It's original intent was to teach children not to react physically to verbal insults, and to ignore them. Which is something that a lot of adults also need to learn.

Zig Ziglar quoted a little girl who said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will break my heart."

Here is my version of it, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me, unless I allow them to"

You, as an adult, have the power to choose whether other people's words will hurt you or not.

If someone approached you and tried to correct you by telling you that 2 + 2 is not equal to 4, you would probably laugh, ignore them, and continue living your life in peace. Why would this correction make no impact in your life?

Because of your confidence that the assertion is mistaken

You should be able to respond in the same way when anyone approaches you and corrects you in any way, as long as they are mistaken in their assertion.

Whether they are bringing up a character flaw, an attitude, action, or they are calling you every name in the book; as long as they are mistaken, you should be able to ignore them and keep living your life without disturbance. So the question is, why don't you react in this way? Here are the two possible answers to that question:

A. They are not mistaken and their assertion is correct, or
B. You are insecure about yourself

Today I want to challenge you to inspect the way you react to people during conflict. Are you confident enough to say to yourself, "They are wrong," and GRACEFULLY ignore them?

Or, if they are correct, are you humble enough to accept that they are correct in their assertion and ask for forgiveness, instead of becoming defensive?

How to Reduce Frustration

"Whoever restrains his words  has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding."  Proverbs 17:27, ESV

I had two people become seriously upset at me this  morning as I was driving to work. Apparently, I was not driving fast enough  for them. What I do not understand is why would they become so upset when  they could clearly see that there was someone in from of me blocking my  way. I was already going ten miles over the speed limit; there was no way  I could possibly go faster. Traffic would not allow it, and I would not  have gone faster even if it had been a possibility.

Life is full of annoying  little instances that cause frustration, delays, inconveniences, and so  forth. Some other instances are not so little, and can be much more painful  and difficult than traffic; these are a topic for a different post.

The  two drivers I encountered this morning were obviously shortsighted. They  could have avoided some serious heartache if they would have taken time  to look a little more carefully and think before reacting in anger. I hope  they have a different attitude towards their families.

We can save ourselves  a lot of frustration by having a little more knowledge and understanding,  like the proverb states. It is a matter of keeping a level head and analyzing  the situation we find ourselves in. It is a matter of understanding that  the past cannot be changed, but it can be learned from. It is a matter  of understanding that people are sinful, and they will let us down. It  is matter of understanding that no one can be perfect, including yourself  and your spouse (if you have, or will have, one.)

Undesirable circumstances are inevitable, but can be reduced by studying them, and learning how to minimize their occurrence.

How often do you find yourself angry, upset,  or frustrated simply because you did not take the time to step back and  look at the situation in more detail before reacting?